THELONIOUS & SHAKEDOWN STREET

Shakedown Street is the heart of town, a-i-i-ght? Let me break it down. Town is the parking lot outside of a music festival. We call it The Lot and its motherfuckin golden. The Lot’s a tailgate party but not like a football game. No one roots for a side, everyone’s on the same team. The hub of The Lot is Shakedown Street. The most vending, the most people, the most action. Shakedown’s golden too. There be magic on Shakedown. Like eating-the-blue-pill-instead-of-the-red-pill-to-escape-the-matrix magic. Or munching-the-mushroom-and-walking-through-the-looking-glass magic. Shakedown Street hangs out in the New Age section of yo bookstore. Check it…a-one two…like a rabbit in a hat or an ace up the sleeve, shakedown could-a put pep in the step of Christopher Reeves…shakedown can hide Houdini and levitate David Blaine, and still know why Crazy Eddie’s price’s are insane. Shakedown—a street giving Earvin Johnson his nickname. That Crazy Eddie reference is for New Yawk headz…buck, buck, buck, RE—spect. Yeah, Shakedown’s the center of a music festival’s universe—it’s sun. The beat to its box. The hip in its hop. Shakedown’s our yellow brick road leading to no destination but Home. And there’s no place like Hiz-ome. shake-it down shake-it down shake-it down down. Let me drop it like it’s hard: Shakedown Street is the frosting that makes Lucky Charms magically delicious. Recognize. Still don’t get it. I’ll school you with the Horowitz quiz…bust it…

Thelonious Horowitz’s Two Question Quiz on Shakedown Street

Shakedown Street to a music festival equals:

A) Market St. to San Francisco
B) St. Marks Place to the Village
C) Washington Ave to Miami Beach nightlife
D) All of the above

Shakedown Street is:

A) More ill than the Vegas strip
B) Crazier than a Moroccan bizarre
C) A place where you can yell Mecca-lecca-high-lecca-Jaime-ho, bitches
D) All of the above

Correct answers: D and D. double d, baby, like the daily double in the OTB…

Like this one? Check out Thelonious go off on scalpers at music festivals